Obadiah's Dissertation on Motherhood
My name is Ephraim Obadiah Prosser, known as 'Obadiah'. I am probably the most opinionated and fanatical Mutha ever to have existed. Ultimate is the greatest sport known to any Homo sapien and all other sports, save Disc Golf only, are vastly inferior to the illuminating light of glory that is - Ultimate Frisbee. I am also the spiritual arm of the Muthaz of Extension. On occasion, I have been known to call upon The Higher Power to assist me and my teammates in winning a game. Frisbees have changed course mid-direction, and sure catches have failed due to the Divine assistance given to us, ending in only Honor for God, and Honor for the Muthaz. I Love Ultimate!!! The Muthaz are the Greatest group of frisbee players in the world!!! All Hail the Muthaz!!!...
Whew! I'm OK now... Suffice it to say that I have a love affair with the game. I am certainly not the best player, but I believe devotion and love and effort can compensate. Pain and the natural breakdown of the clothing played-in constitute honor and glory among the Muthaz (ghanima), and I have sent numerous pairs of jeans through the gauntlet of Ultimate Frisbee. Purity of the sport is essential, and defacing the game or the Muthaz by allowing... unworthy... elements in (Sunny-day muthaz, or even freeloading football players coming by) is next to sin. I have played a major role in texturizing the terminology of the Muthaz' game. Words like ghanima, Ya Hya Chouhada!, Mu Zein Wallah!, Haiiiii-Yoh!, hajr, The Test-Mashad, Walli, (Afro-) Picks, and even Kull Wahad! can be traced to my suggestions. Even the formerly dishonorable term, touchdown, has been changed to its true usage and destiny in Ultimate Frisbee due to my proper usage (when a pass hits the ground without anyone catching it).
I only excuse Ultimate for my religion and I play barefoot in ANY weather or conditions - ANY. I have a tradition of being the most muddy player among the Muthaz also, and I had the distinction of being among those in The Great Mutha Lock-out and Detention Days. I never remove my shirt to play, which is rare among us. I recently have been able to get The Muthaz of Extension logo out to Scotland for some International prominence. I go about spreading the fame and knowledge of Ultimate Frisbee and the Muthaz to all who are worthy to hear and will listen.
Functionally, I am something of the 'Long Arm' of The Triange, or the 'Death Tripod' among my faction. 'The Triange' consists of myself, Scott Presley (MVP), and our highly-esteemed home page author, Ryan Smith (the Lamanite). I obtain the frisbee at the other end of the field, long bomb (or Kill it! as it is said) to either Ryan or Scott, and they pass it one more time for a point. This works well because I can't jump (or run), but I can defend a little, and Ryan and Scott are very fast runners. They're also so used to my horribly crooked curves that if they don't end up catching it, usually no one does. We win alot.
The game is sacred, the Muthaz are sacred, I am One with it and them, and I am Obadiah, the Priest and Mutha.
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